Episode 4: Social Distancing Part I

On March 12th of this year, I told Jen it's time to shut it down. I mean, like really shut it all down. A "storm" was coming and we needed to take shelter. Here in Kansas, taking shelter is a regular occurrence. For our family, that involves 30 minutes or so of being in close quarters in our safe room, hoping the storm passes by without much fanfare. We do what we can to keep four kids calm during that short window. While it can be inconvenient, it's only a short time and it's worth it. I'm all for sheltering and taking appropriate actions, but I was less-than-enthusiastic thinking of telling Jen that she and the kids would need to "shelter" for weeks, possibly even longer, as we prepared for the arrival of  "storm" COVID.

For those who don't have kids, let me confirm everything you've heard...parents need breaks. This is especially true for any parent, like Jen, who stays at home with the kids for significant amounts of time. Nothing wrong with that, but boy did I have concerns about some of those breaks being unavailable for awhile, at least in the traditional sense.

Three weeks in, the house is still standing, Jen hasn't run away, and the kids haven't staged a coup! Being cooped up in the house hasn't been nearly as bad as I worried it would be, but it's also not been perfect. Let's take a peak into the Martin residence and see what weeks at home with four kids looks like...

To give a little background, we made the decision, from the beginning, to halt anything that involved leaving the house or being around people. At least one of our kids falls into the  higher risk category, so we want to protect her and, of course, anyone else in that category (outside of our home). The exceptions to staying home have been for work (certain parts of my job can't be done through teleworking), groceries, or emergencies. That last one is trickier than you might think.

When you take away school and other regular outings, kids get bored. In the past three weeks, we have had at least two "near-misses" for ER visits (doctor's cleared us for home monitoring with both). One incident involved a head-on-collision in the hallway and a loose baby tooth (it needs to come out anyway!). Another incident involved our oldest daughter injuring herself while re-enacting how she almost injured herself. Yeah, think about the irony of that one for a minute...

School has returned for our oldest daughter (age 8), but it's like homeschooling on steroids. We get a lesson plan emailed to us each week, along with a week's worth of homework assignments. Jen LOVES it...truly. The only thing she has to figure out is how to log into the 300 different websites the school uses for lessons, which can be tricky with rolling passwords and a daughter who doesn't know what ITO means.

Meanwhile, our youngest daughter (age 3) is thrilled to have her older brother and sister home. Playtime buddies! Interestingly, they've been playing doctor a lot and our oldest daughter even went as far as to build a mock hospital. Interesting because we haven't talked about the virus much with the kids. Heck, we still haven't actually told our oldest son that preschool is done for the season (we're working up to that one).

Hanging out with the neighbors and friends from school has turned virtual. Thank God for Skype, Zoom, Facebook, and Google Hangouts! Our oldest has even practiced "parallel play" with the neighbors (each playing the same thing, but in their own driveways). One family has regularly left messages in chalk on our driveway for our kids. It's been neat to see even the kids find creative ways to stay connected.

Back inside the "shelter", Jen and I have been doing a lot of Skyping with friends and family. My family started having weekly Zoom "meetings", just for the adults. It's good to have adult conversation and to see each other's faces (Facebook reminds us the importance of seeing faces). Our oldest has regular Zoom meetings with her teacher and her class. Somehow the teacher was able to get each of the kids to mute their mics. #success Our church has also started doing services over Zoom, although trying to get the kids to sit still in the living room doesn't have quite the same effect as it does at church.

Outside of the rogue, anomalous cold front, the number of nice weather days continues to increase with spring well underway here on the Plains! The ability to go outside is great for all of us. Three of our kids deal with outdoor allergies, but so far so good on that front, even with increased outdoor play.

This "episode" is titled Part I because Part II hasn't been written yet. There will probably even be a sequel to that sequel. Is that a threequel? Where appropriate, I believe it is good to find some humor in the midst of sadness. But, don't let that fool you into thinking life is perfect in the Martin casa. Cabin fever, unscheduled homeschooling, and a temporary hold on outings does take a toll. Oh, and there is this whole uncertainty thing.

Times like this require more intentionality...to smile, to stay connected, to love, to listen, to act in wisdom and not fear, to be creative. With everything going on, we hope our posts remind you that your aren't alone in the struggle to raise kids in the middle of a pandemic.

Written by Roger
Filmed in Kansas